In response to William C. Duncan, and his article titled “A child is not an entitlement and a uterus is not a commodity,” I reply as a woman who has experienced infertility and in turn, was inspired to help grow families through egg donation and surrogacy.
First, I will provide some clarification on a part of surrogacy that seems to mislead many. The most common arrangement is what is called gestational surrogacy. In this arrangement, the woman acting as the surrogate does not have any genetic connection to the fetus whatsoever. I make this distinction because in no way does a surrogate “give her child away.” She carried the pregnancy, but there is no biological, genetic, or contractual link to the offspring.
In that vein, the role of surrogate or egg donor should be clarified by definition, as both seem to be addressed in this article as a “commodity.” A commodity, as defined in the Miriam-Webster dictionary, is something to be bought and sold and/or exploited. I assume the author was referring to this when reducing surrogates down to a “uterus” and stating that they can be bought. I want to make one thing clear: I am an independent, educated individual with two children of my own. My family lives what I would call a very normal, American dream life. In no way was I coerced into an agreement to donate my eggs or carry another person’s baby. As a whole person not be be reduced to my reproductive organs, I made these decisions to help others as do all other egg donors and surrogates. The notion that surrogacy or donation preys on women who see no other way to provide for themselves is not only completely false, but against surrogacy rules. Potential surrogates must be financially stable and not on any form of government assistance to enter these agreements.
As previously stated, I went through infertility and was thankfully able to conceive my children through the use of in vitro fertilization. However, due to my experience, I understand that infertility is not that “easy” for many. This is why I help others. I know the pain and heartache. I know the yearning to have something that comes so easily to others. And if I have the ability to take that pain away from someone else struggling, then why wouldn’t I help?
I will point out that, yes, there are risks to pregnancy and egg donation. Donors and surrogates know of these risks and agree to them. To be frank, pregnancy can be miserable and egg donation and retrieval can be uncomfortable. This is exactly why compensation may be involved. Nobody is buying a baby or purchasing my eggs. I am compensated for my time and the discomfort I may experience. My uterus is not for sale or even for rent. I chose to bring a child into this world so that others could experience the joy of being parents.
The last point I must clarify is Mr. Duncan’s notion that these children are in one way or another missing a father or mother. The child that I carried is by no means missing a mother, because that is not my title. He has two loving parents that yearned for him for years. The couples to whom I donated my eggs are now able to hold a title of mother and father; something that may have not happened otherwise. I used my ability to help fulfill the dreams of others so that they may also hear the words “mom” and “dad” from a child’s mouth.
Karen Schafer is a mother of two living in Salt Lake City.